City vs Country

Well its been a really long while since I looked at my blog... my life has been entirely too chaotic with so many major life decisions and changes that I have felt like my head has been spinning for the last 6 months. Without getting into the "why" of it all, I can say that enough was enough and it was time for a change.

Some people who know me thought the idea absurd that I of all people would ever desire or be able to function in a rural setting. After all I am an avid cyclist (of course I support bike lanes), love the feel of downtown,  and am big on urban agriculture (community gardens). I also love the idea of local food and even more than that, knowing where my food comes from and how it is handled before I consume it. In saying all that,wouldn't the next logical step for me to start my own small scale hobby farm?

I have loved all of the "benefits" of city living. We have been in Red Deer for almost 5 years and it has been good to us. I have made it my home... I have built some incredible, once in a lifetime relationships (many of them from Twitter if you believe it) and have actively contributed to making Red Deer a better place. But in saying that sometimes we are faced with a crossroad, pinnacle moment where we need to make a really tough decision...... regardless of our personal feelings, regardless of what we "want" and give all that up to do what we NEED to do to better our families and and perhaps those we have not met yet. I feel so strongly about this.... we need to recognize that our purpose is greater than saving for retirement or another trip to Mexico and focus our time investing in people that really need it.

I have felt for a while that my time in Red Deer was coming to a close, not because I wanted it to but because I felt I had fulfilled the reason for moving to Red Deer.... Our life here has been hard and wonderful and I am grateful for it but what I am going to in Olds needs more than an occasional visit. Call me hokey, illogical or whatever but this is something I NEED to do. Am I grieving the loss of my life now?? sure am... but this too will pass.

In saying all this... today was a rough day of transition. We have moved onto our friends farm for the next few months until our house sells,  25 minutes from town and my day to day life is now drastically different. No more... "\let's see how the day goes".... no more spontaneous coffee dates with friends. Today was my first real day living this new reality. Lots of sitting around... doing my friends dishes ... a little bit of work and then what?? AND... THEN... WHAT.... by the afternoon I came out of my room and being in tears told my husband that I needed to get a routine. I need to find "normal" again... whatever that may be... but just hanging around the house and spending a few hours doing some work is not going to cut it... So if you have an suggestions that can make an urban to rural transition a little easier I would love to hear your suggestions.