It's happened... I think I am finally an adult. Shocking really.I've been married for over 10 years, have 2 kids and a house and NOW IT FINALLY HAPPENS. In the last few months or so I have started to notice certain thought patterns changing and my taste buds too. Things I have despised for over 30 years I suddenly like.
In my 20's I married and had kids. I sat around boardroom tables with people old enough to be my parents and felt the need to fight to be on those boards. I faced being judged based on my age and appearance and felt like a little kid all the time. I'm still the youngest at most meetings and events but now I feel like I have earned the right to be there.
Now I wonder are my thought patterns changing because of my age? Or perhaps that my pre teen daughter has driven me to the point of near insanity since starting middle school? The drama has been unreal and I do sympathize with my daughter that what she faces everyday at school is a lot harder than what I faced in school. But seriously, I have grey hair coming in by the dozens and have found wrinkles ....can you believe it WRINKLES!!!
This past weekend I attended a scrap booking retreat south of Delburne with a bunch of ladies I was introduced to by my ant....(and yes that is the correct spelling for my fathers' sister). So in the group you have "The Young and the Restless" and "The Blood Sisters" . Both groups are made up of mostly 45+ year old women (some closer to 60 ) . About 10 % of us still get periods. You get the picture. They are a wonderful group of ladies. It's very interesting to sit and listen to them chat about their lives and the lives of their families. Not in a gossipy type of way but more of a sharing, learning and confiding kind of way.
There really is so much to learn from an older generation. That is not one of my new "adult" thoughts. I firmly believe that if you want to appreciate what have now, you need to hear about the past and the kinds of challenges and hardships our grandparents and great aunts and uncles had to endure.
Back to my new found "adulthood". So to give you some examples of my crossing over.... For the last several years I have always drank coffee and Bailey's on Saturday mornings. A great ritual I think.. sadly, I could really care less about the Bailey's anymore. Oh, and my favourite coffee of all time (Hylander Grogg).... ya, not so much. It's OK for a treat but I have 3 bags of it in my closet and haven't touched it since the hubby has been working. I now more prefer my Pike Place Roast from Starbucks.
Another example? Well, I now LOVE sauerkraut. Never used to, but whenever I have a smokey (which isn't very often) it is now mandatory along with lots of mustard.
And those "adult" thoughts well....I've learned that if getting older means growing up... then perhaps I'm not interested. Although I will always force healthy food on my kids and refuse to buy them video games, I still think that my tattoos are pretty cool and nothing is better than hanging out with a bunch of teenagers. They keep me young. Oh, and even though my mother said that someday I would grow up and have better taste in music, I still love all the music that our local "Kraze" station has to offer. Sorry mom.
Until next time..... the newest adult on the block.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Saturday, October 16, 2010
She Has a Name
I have just got home from a reading of local author and play write Andrew Kooman's play "She Has a Name". (http://www.andrewkooman.com/)
As I sat through the first act of the play that was read by 4 individuals, trying to choke back the tears that came with the realization that human life is not sacred and that our "civilized society" has a dirty secret as big or bigger than the drug trade. It's called Human Trafficking.
*There are 27 million slaves worldwide. Experts estimate nearly 1 million people are trafficked in the sex trade every year. Human trafficking is the fastest growing criminal trade second only to the illegal sale of drugs with an estimated annual profit of 31 billion US dollars.
I sit in my seat thinking about my own kids who are around 10 years old, I am hearing these actors speak of children who's parents sell them to make a few bucks. They go from vibrant, smart kids who love school and have great dreams to living in brothels having sex with dozens of men every day. Many have not even hit puberty yet. As a mother, this rips my heart out. I understand why people don't like to talk about these things. So gruesome and horrid...(it makes me sick to my stomach).
We live in our cities in Canada, enjoying a great life and yet right under our noses (even in Red Deer) there are girls who are working... night after night.. day after day.... with no rights, no identity .... Don't kid yourself and think it's not happening. It is. There are 2 if not more brothels in Red Deer... the ladies that work there didn't apply for a job.
I get up to leave the reading and there's a lump in my throat.. I can't speak for fear of crying.. The mood after is sobering... A friend of mine has painted a picture for this play. It has a young girls face and beside it.. a bar code ... she is nothing more than "number 18". No name, no family to identify with.... just a piece of property.
I am grateful to know that there are local agencies that are dedicated to raising awareness and helping victims of trafficking. The Alberta Coalition on Human Trafficking (http://www.actalberta.org/) operates a safe house for victims of human trafficking and Raise Their Voice (http://www.raisetheirvoice.com/) is raising awareness in central Alberta. I challenge you to check out their websites and just ponder for a few minutes what is really going on in our world. I sit in my chair in front of my computer and wonder what to do with this information I now have. I'm so glad I went tonight but also wish I hadn't..... I just want to hug my kids a little tighter and thank God for them.
More needs to be done. I found out this evening at the reading that The Body Shop is collecting signatures to petition the Canadian Government in implementing strict anti trafficking policies and legislation and dedicate more resources to victims of human trafficking. You can sign their petition at www.thebodyshop.com/_en/_ww/values-campaigns/trafficking.aspx . So far they have 500,000 signatures and have a goal of 1 million before they present the petition to the government of Canada.
She Has a Name is looking for some financial assistance to bring this urgent and important message to the stage. If you are able to contribute in any way visit http://www.raisetheirvoice.com/
The World Premiere and Tour of "She Has a Name" starts the end of February in Calgary and early March in Red Deer.
This is one play you won't want to miss. Although a hard pill to swallow, you will truly be touched and amazed at the talent and message that has gone into this script.
Thank You Andrew for giving a voice to those with no name.
(* Taken from She Has a Name promo material)
As I sat through the first act of the play that was read by 4 individuals, trying to choke back the tears that came with the realization that human life is not sacred and that our "civilized society" has a dirty secret as big or bigger than the drug trade. It's called Human Trafficking.
*There are 27 million slaves worldwide. Experts estimate nearly 1 million people are trafficked in the sex trade every year. Human trafficking is the fastest growing criminal trade second only to the illegal sale of drugs with an estimated annual profit of 31 billion US dollars.
I sit in my seat thinking about my own kids who are around 10 years old, I am hearing these actors speak of children who's parents sell them to make a few bucks. They go from vibrant, smart kids who love school and have great dreams to living in brothels having sex with dozens of men every day. Many have not even hit puberty yet. As a mother, this rips my heart out. I understand why people don't like to talk about these things. So gruesome and horrid...(it makes me sick to my stomach).
We live in our cities in Canada, enjoying a great life and yet right under our noses (even in Red Deer) there are girls who are working... night after night.. day after day.... with no rights, no identity .... Don't kid yourself and think it's not happening. It is. There are 2 if not more brothels in Red Deer... the ladies that work there didn't apply for a job.
I get up to leave the reading and there's a lump in my throat.. I can't speak for fear of crying.. The mood after is sobering... A friend of mine has painted a picture for this play. It has a young girls face and beside it.. a bar code ... she is nothing more than "number 18". No name, no family to identify with.... just a piece of property.
I am grateful to know that there are local agencies that are dedicated to raising awareness and helping victims of trafficking. The Alberta Coalition on Human Trafficking (http://www.actalberta.org/) operates a safe house for victims of human trafficking and Raise Their Voice (http://www.raisetheirvoice.com/) is raising awareness in central Alberta. I challenge you to check out their websites and just ponder for a few minutes what is really going on in our world. I sit in my chair in front of my computer and wonder what to do with this information I now have. I'm so glad I went tonight but also wish I hadn't..... I just want to hug my kids a little tighter and thank God for them.
More needs to be done. I found out this evening at the reading that The Body Shop is collecting signatures to petition the Canadian Government in implementing strict anti trafficking policies and legislation and dedicate more resources to victims of human trafficking. You can sign their petition at www.thebodyshop.com/_en/_ww/values-campaigns/trafficking.aspx . So far they have 500,000 signatures and have a goal of 1 million before they present the petition to the government of Canada.
She Has a Name is looking for some financial assistance to bring this urgent and important message to the stage. If you are able to contribute in any way visit http://www.raisetheirvoice.com/
The World Premiere and Tour of "She Has a Name" starts the end of February in Calgary and early March in Red Deer.
This is one play you won't want to miss. Although a hard pill to swallow, you will truly be touched and amazed at the talent and message that has gone into this script.
Thank You Andrew for giving a voice to those with no name.
(* Taken from She Has a Name promo material)
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Elections Around Alberta
Things are really heating up on the election front...and not just in Red Deer. Last night I was the moderator for the Election Forum in Penhold. (Footage from the event can be found at www.rdtv.ca and on You tube. Search Pehold Forum )
For those of you readers NOT from central Alberta, Penhold is 14 km south west of Red Deer. As I look at the issues facing Penhold I draw a comparison with some if the same issues that voters in Wood Buffalo are facing. Both have recently finished major building projects. Penhold got a new multiplex and Fort McMurray a new recreation facility (MacDonald Island Park). Both facilities are huge assets to their communities and both brought some debt with with them.
I love politics. I love seeing passionate people wanting to make a difference in their communities. I believe that regardless of platform, candidates want to make things better for themselves and others. This round of elections are bitter sweet for me. Several years ago I had made the decision to run in Wood Buffalo in this election. We had planned on staying in Wood Buffalo for 5 more years.
Plans changed and we relocated to Red Deer. Although I am not running in this election, I still keep tabs on what is going on back home (Fort McMurray) and am excited to see the new faces vying for a place on council. I am still a big supporter of current mayor Melissa Blake (my kids and I helped with her last campaign) and am excited to see if my dear friend Russell Thomas is going to be elected..
Back in Red Deer things are getting interesting. There are 18 candidates running for 8 spots on council. Personally I think a big shake up is needed. Red Deer is at a critical point in it's growth and if not managed properly could be disastrous for our well being in the long term. Sure there are a couple of existing councillors that I am voting for, the ones that are forward thinking visionaries, but I am also voting for quite a few newbies too. Being new isn't bad. Being new means you have great ideas, energy, new ways of doing things and an untainted perspective on how things can and should be done. Good Luck with your campaigns!
I would like to dedicate this blog entry to a couple of different groups. First to all the new candidates that have put their names forward both in Central Alberta and Wood Buffalo and the second to two of my faithful readers.... My father in law Harry Anthony and friend Marlene Lane. Both residents of Fort McMurray.
Now get out there and VOTE!!!
For those of you readers NOT from central Alberta, Penhold is 14 km south west of Red Deer. As I look at the issues facing Penhold I draw a comparison with some if the same issues that voters in Wood Buffalo are facing. Both have recently finished major building projects. Penhold got a new multiplex and Fort McMurray a new recreation facility (MacDonald Island Park). Both facilities are huge assets to their communities and both brought some debt with with them.
I love politics. I love seeing passionate people wanting to make a difference in their communities. I believe that regardless of platform, candidates want to make things better for themselves and others. This round of elections are bitter sweet for me. Several years ago I had made the decision to run in Wood Buffalo in this election. We had planned on staying in Wood Buffalo for 5 more years.
Plans changed and we relocated to Red Deer. Although I am not running in this election, I still keep tabs on what is going on back home (Fort McMurray) and am excited to see the new faces vying for a place on council. I am still a big supporter of current mayor Melissa Blake (my kids and I helped with her last campaign) and am excited to see if my dear friend Russell Thomas is going to be elected..
Back in Red Deer things are getting interesting. There are 18 candidates running for 8 spots on council. Personally I think a big shake up is needed. Red Deer is at a critical point in it's growth and if not managed properly could be disastrous for our well being in the long term. Sure there are a couple of existing councillors that I am voting for, the ones that are forward thinking visionaries, but I am also voting for quite a few newbies too. Being new isn't bad. Being new means you have great ideas, energy, new ways of doing things and an untainted perspective on how things can and should be done. Good Luck with your campaigns!
I would like to dedicate this blog entry to a couple of different groups. First to all the new candidates that have put their names forward both in Central Alberta and Wood Buffalo and the second to two of my faithful readers.... My father in law Harry Anthony and friend Marlene Lane. Both residents of Fort McMurray.
Now get out there and VOTE!!!
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Kitchen Table Talks
Last night I had the opportunity to work with ReThink Red Deer (http://www.rethinkreddeer.ca/) in coordinating and facilitating the first ever "Kitchen Table Talks" Election Forum.
This was no regular candidates forum. Instead of the usual panel / debate, yes and no questioning that is typical of an election forum ReThink Red Deer came up with a new and innovative way to engage citizens and candidates.
I met with Lorne Daniel several weeks ago to figure out what this event might look like and for a first time I must say I was pretty impressed at the outcome of the evening. Although I have seen this format used for other purposes I have never seen it used in this capacity. It was an amazing way for candidates to really hear what people think. The Advocate did a great piece on the event. The link is posted above....
Regardless of the topic that each table had to discuss, I noticed that the common thread that each facilitator shared at the end of the evening was that there is a strong need to come up with new and innovative ways to engage the public. Not just because it's part of policy but because citizens need to be engaged ... not just sometime.. but ALL THE TIME. Open houses are not effective anymore. I know it's cliche to say but people are too busy and evenings are not good for anyone with a family.
It was great to be apart of an "innovative" way to engage people of all ages in who they should elect for Red Deer's next council. Facilitation is my passion so to be apart of something like this was a no brainer... mix in my love of politics and the political process I was happier than a pig in..... well you know. Not only did I get to facilitate, I got to meet some amazing voters and candidates and that has helped me to figure out who I will vote for and who I will NOT be voting for. So far I have settled on 5 candidates that I am confident on voting for but still need to do a little more research to get 3 more.
A big thanks to everyone that participated in Election ReThink and I look forward to seeing you all on Oct. 18.
This was no regular candidates forum. Instead of the usual panel / debate, yes and no questioning that is typical of an election forum ReThink Red Deer came up with a new and innovative way to engage citizens and candidates.
I met with Lorne Daniel several weeks ago to figure out what this event might look like and for a first time I must say I was pretty impressed at the outcome of the evening. Although I have seen this format used for other purposes I have never seen it used in this capacity. It was an amazing way for candidates to really hear what people think. The Advocate did a great piece on the event. The link is posted above....
Regardless of the topic that each table had to discuss, I noticed that the common thread that each facilitator shared at the end of the evening was that there is a strong need to come up with new and innovative ways to engage the public. Not just because it's part of policy but because citizens need to be engaged ... not just sometime.. but ALL THE TIME. Open houses are not effective anymore. I know it's cliche to say but people are too busy and evenings are not good for anyone with a family.
It was great to be apart of an "innovative" way to engage people of all ages in who they should elect for Red Deer's next council. Facilitation is my passion so to be apart of something like this was a no brainer... mix in my love of politics and the political process I was happier than a pig in..... well you know. Not only did I get to facilitate, I got to meet some amazing voters and candidates and that has helped me to figure out who I will vote for and who I will NOT be voting for. So far I have settled on 5 candidates that I am confident on voting for but still need to do a little more research to get 3 more.
A big thanks to everyone that participated in Election ReThink and I look forward to seeing you all on Oct. 18.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Voter Turnout
Elections are just over a month away. I love fall elections... it's interesting to see the new faces who are running first time campaigns. They tend to be the ones you see out and about.
One candidate I spoke with mentioned that we need to increase voter turnout. I couldn't agree more. With a voter turnout rate of 22% it is a clear indication to me that what has worked in the past regarding voting and campaigns ISN'T WORKING ANYMORE.
The perception is that the larger the signage the higher your votes will be. Not the case. We can all agree that engagement is an issue. We need the votes... but the voters can't be bothered. Why is that?? Well, I have a pretty good idea why. We are not relating or communicating in a way that is conducive to a younger generational response. I commend those that week after week are at the public market. But you are only being exposed to a small amount of our population.
Here's a thought, If you want higher voter turn out.... and you WANT a younger demographic taking interest in municipal politics then perhaps you need to engage in a younger way. Here are a few ways you can do that.
Location, Location, Location
Ok I sounded like a realtor for a minute there. But seriously. Where does the 18-30 year olds hang out? Where do teens hang out?? The mall, movies, pubs, bars, high schools, RDC???. Perhaps these are not usual places to campaign but if you want to influence a generation you need to be and go where they are.
What do you wear?
Here's a little secret... if you "dress" better than teens and young adults, they think that you think you are better than them. If you choose to go to these non traditional venues then perhaps jeans and a hoodie would be more fitting. I ran a youth centre in Fort McMurray and always dressed the same as the kids did. It would often be a surprise to the business folk if they asked for the manager or executive director... but I didn't care. My role was to support teens and to do that I had to dress and talk at their level.
Speaking of talk... young people want plain English. "How's it goin'?" Talk TO them not AT them. Don't ask them what they think the issues are.. ask them"What pisses you off about our city?" or "What do you love about living here?" Keep it casual and real. Young people can smell bull shit a mile away.
Social Media
This is the way that our younger generation communicates. Do you have a Facebook page?? Great if you do and if you don't ... well that's sad for you. Things like Facebook are so critical in youth engagement. Keep in mind that if you do not interact with your "friends" regularly then you really are wasting every ones time. Twitter is great for getting your message out. It tends to be a little bit of an older demographic that uses twitter (more over the age of 25) but it's instant and a great way to keep people engaged with your campaign. You Tube is another great tool. Creating short videos and sharing them on your Facebook, twitter or website is a great way to get your message out.
Campaign Team
Just one thought here. How many young people do you have as part of your campaign team? A campaign needs to be balanced. Without a few young people, you will quickly get tunnel vision. You need that younger perspective.
Be Available
If you do not currently welcome open conversation anytime someone has a question for you then you have not only lost their vote but in a young persons mind they are going to say forget this voting thing. Plain and simple
So to wrap this all up. I wanted to provide you with some dates and locations of forums and other means to connect with our candidates. Take advantage of these candidates and call or email them your questions or concerns. How they respond will be a good indication of their commitment to their jobs.
A great website to research the different candidates http://www.electionforum.ca/
There will be an Election Forum put on by the Red Deer Chamber of Commerce
Oct 7 at The Red Deer Lodge from 7-9
http://www.reddeerchamber.com/ and click on events
ReThink Red Deer is hosting Election ReThink at RDC on Sept. 28 from 6:30 - 9.
"Kitchen Table Talks" are designed to go beyond the one sentence or yes or no answers to a more in depth understanding of election issues.
www.rethinkreddeer.ca/events for all the details.
One candidate I spoke with mentioned that we need to increase voter turnout. I couldn't agree more. With a voter turnout rate of 22% it is a clear indication to me that what has worked in the past regarding voting and campaigns ISN'T WORKING ANYMORE.
The perception is that the larger the signage the higher your votes will be. Not the case. We can all agree that engagement is an issue. We need the votes... but the voters can't be bothered. Why is that?? Well, I have a pretty good idea why. We are not relating or communicating in a way that is conducive to a younger generational response. I commend those that week after week are at the public market. But you are only being exposed to a small amount of our population.
Here's a thought, If you want higher voter turn out.... and you WANT a younger demographic taking interest in municipal politics then perhaps you need to engage in a younger way. Here are a few ways you can do that.
Location, Location, Location
Ok I sounded like a realtor for a minute there. But seriously. Where does the 18-30 year olds hang out? Where do teens hang out?? The mall, movies, pubs, bars, high schools, RDC???. Perhaps these are not usual places to campaign but if you want to influence a generation you need to be and go where they are.
What do you wear?
Here's a little secret... if you "dress" better than teens and young adults, they think that you think you are better than them. If you choose to go to these non traditional venues then perhaps jeans and a hoodie would be more fitting. I ran a youth centre in Fort McMurray and always dressed the same as the kids did. It would often be a surprise to the business folk if they asked for the manager or executive director... but I didn't care. My role was to support teens and to do that I had to dress and talk at their level.
Speaking of talk... young people want plain English. "How's it goin'?" Talk TO them not AT them. Don't ask them what they think the issues are.. ask them"What pisses you off about our city?" or "What do you love about living here?" Keep it casual and real. Young people can smell bull shit a mile away.
Social Media
This is the way that our younger generation communicates. Do you have a Facebook page?? Great if you do and if you don't ... well that's sad for you. Things like Facebook are so critical in youth engagement. Keep in mind that if you do not interact with your "friends" regularly then you really are wasting every ones time. Twitter is great for getting your message out. It tends to be a little bit of an older demographic that uses twitter (more over the age of 25) but it's instant and a great way to keep people engaged with your campaign. You Tube is another great tool. Creating short videos and sharing them on your Facebook, twitter or website is a great way to get your message out.
Campaign Team
Just one thought here. How many young people do you have as part of your campaign team? A campaign needs to be balanced. Without a few young people, you will quickly get tunnel vision. You need that younger perspective.
Be Available
If you do not currently welcome open conversation anytime someone has a question for you then you have not only lost their vote but in a young persons mind they are going to say forget this voting thing. Plain and simple
So to wrap this all up. I wanted to provide you with some dates and locations of forums and other means to connect with our candidates. Take advantage of these candidates and call or email them your questions or concerns. How they respond will be a good indication of their commitment to their jobs.
A great website to research the different candidates http://www.electionforum.ca/
There will be an Election Forum put on by the Red Deer Chamber of Commerce
Oct 7 at The Red Deer Lodge from 7-9
http://www.reddeerchamber.com/ and click on events
ReThink Red Deer is hosting Election ReThink at RDC on Sept. 28 from 6:30 - 9.
"Kitchen Table Talks" are designed to go beyond the one sentence or yes or no answers to a more in depth understanding of election issues.
www.rethinkreddeer.ca/events for all the details.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Bring the 80's back
Another interesting day it has been. I got a call from my daughter this morning who was completely frantic. Someone in her middle school created a Facebook account using her name and sent out a bunch of messages to her friends telling them to meet her at her locker. She showed up to school with all her friends around her locker wondering what she wanted.
This would be fine and dandy but she does not have a Facebook account. Now I know your first though might be that "maybe she has an account and you do not know about it" .. well that is not the case in this situation. On a side note, I learned this morning that by law you need to be at least 13 to have a Facebook account. My daughter is 11 and almost the only person in her circle of friends that does not have a Facebook profile.
While dealing with this situation this morning I was listening to CBC radio with Jian Ghomeshi speaking with a lady about marketing to children. So the Facebook situation and the CBC radio show collided and I am at my computer "telling you how I really feel".
I am a kid of the 80's. We played outside every day. We had to walk to school. There were no cell phones, Internet.... as far as video games were concerned we had a sega that we played once in a blue moon. We had to eat healthy meals and got a spank if we talked back to our parents. We were not over weight and could occupy ourselves for hours with very little.
Fast forward to today. Where is this generations parents? Did you know you that you have kids? Do you know what they look at online? Why do they dictate what you buy and what you do?
We as a society have created a "monster" generation of kids that feel entitled to everything that we as adults have worked so hard for. Kids have no consequences to their actions anymore. Parents make excuses for and defend their children to avoid getting in trouble.We stand back and are baffled when our "adult" children are still living at home with maybe a job...or not.
My kids do not have cell phones. (and won't unless they can pay for them). They do not have free reign in my home. TV and computers are for the weekends only unless it involves homework. We have just gotten given to us an original xbox that my brother was going to throw away and the kids can play that.... but on the weekends only. My kids are NOT overweight. We teach them everyday the importance of face to face relationships and communication. (not through emails or texting) We keep the kids active but not so busy that they don't have time to think about their future and we are actively involved in every aspect of their lives.
Talks about sex, drug, dating and the like are regular topics at our house. ("Awkward converation mom..") Our kids share with us the "nothing" stuff about their day and when the "something" comes up.... they know we are right there to give solid advice and support.
I need to give (it is my JOB to give) my kids the tools that they need to be successful independent adults. That won't happen if I do not engage in conversation with them, give them everything they ask for, and do everything for them. Sure it's an up hill battle (what kids actually "wants" to clean their room and do chores). As my mother said to me back in the day "You'll thank me for this someday" I am now saying to my mom "Thank You".
I'm not anti media. I in fact am a self proclaimed social media junky. I love facebook and twitter and I see the value in it everyday. But it's about balance. Make the important things priority. It's never to late to change the way you do things. I am always thinking back to when I was the age of my kids to remember and to relate and do things the way they were done when the world made sense. Recently someone said to me after I shared our TV policy "Wow, your a parent of the 80's" Well, I guess I am.... I'll take that as a compliment.
This would be fine and dandy but she does not have a Facebook account. Now I know your first though might be that "maybe she has an account and you do not know about it" .. well that is not the case in this situation. On a side note, I learned this morning that by law you need to be at least 13 to have a Facebook account. My daughter is 11 and almost the only person in her circle of friends that does not have a Facebook profile.
While dealing with this situation this morning I was listening to CBC radio with Jian Ghomeshi speaking with a lady about marketing to children. So the Facebook situation and the CBC radio show collided and I am at my computer "telling you how I really feel".
I am a kid of the 80's. We played outside every day. We had to walk to school. There were no cell phones, Internet.... as far as video games were concerned we had a sega that we played once in a blue moon. We had to eat healthy meals and got a spank if we talked back to our parents. We were not over weight and could occupy ourselves for hours with very little.
Fast forward to today. Where is this generations parents? Did you know you that you have kids? Do you know what they look at online? Why do they dictate what you buy and what you do?
We as a society have created a "monster" generation of kids that feel entitled to everything that we as adults have worked so hard for. Kids have no consequences to their actions anymore. Parents make excuses for and defend their children to avoid getting in trouble.We stand back and are baffled when our "adult" children are still living at home with maybe a job...or not.
My kids do not have cell phones. (and won't unless they can pay for them). They do not have free reign in my home. TV and computers are for the weekends only unless it involves homework. We have just gotten given to us an original xbox that my brother was going to throw away and the kids can play that.... but on the weekends only. My kids are NOT overweight. We teach them everyday the importance of face to face relationships and communication. (not through emails or texting) We keep the kids active but not so busy that they don't have time to think about their future and we are actively involved in every aspect of their lives.
Talks about sex, drug, dating and the like are regular topics at our house. ("Awkward converation mom..") Our kids share with us the "nothing" stuff about their day and when the "something" comes up.... they know we are right there to give solid advice and support.
I need to give (it is my JOB to give) my kids the tools that they need to be successful independent adults. That won't happen if I do not engage in conversation with them, give them everything they ask for, and do everything for them. Sure it's an up hill battle (what kids actually "wants" to clean their room and do chores). As my mother said to me back in the day "You'll thank me for this someday" I am now saying to my mom "Thank You".
I'm not anti media. I in fact am a self proclaimed social media junky. I love facebook and twitter and I see the value in it everyday. But it's about balance. Make the important things priority. It's never to late to change the way you do things. I am always thinking back to when I was the age of my kids to remember and to relate and do things the way they were done when the world made sense. Recently someone said to me after I shared our TV policy "Wow, your a parent of the 80's" Well, I guess I am.... I'll take that as a compliment.
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